Chores are a Gift to Help You Grow Up!



Denver LOVES fresh corn; and he's willing
to shuck and clean it, too!



Okay, so no one is buying that one!

When I was growing up, I  remember doing very few chores that weren't directly related to my own body or possessions.  I brushed my teeth.  I cleaned my room occassionally.  I didn't learn to cook, and I rarely helped clean the house.  Mom did it all.  She worked 12 hours a day and then came home for her second shift.  Whenever I was asked to do a chore-- usually during summer vacation when I was home all day while Mom worked-- I felt like chores were someone else's job.  How spoiled I was!  How ridiculous to not realize the importance of helping.  Even worse-- I didn't realize that as a family member, I had an obligation to help.

I recently read a book about education and parenting practices in other cultures-- particularly western european countries and Japan.  In those countries, parents and teachers emphasize independence in a way that our culture does not.  Japanese children carry their books, bags, and lunch to school without assistance.  They often walk rather long distances while doing so.  They are expected to take care of their possessions and be able to assist with family meal preparation at a young age.  In many european countries, children are expected to participate in the running of the household.  This includes caring for younger siblings as well as oneself.  People in other countries refer to the way we treat our children as "The Child King."  They see middle class American children as unable to function independently because everything is done for them.  



Car Maintenance class with Dadders.



I think our culture used to be different.  I know my parents-- especially my father-- were active members of the family who helped with livestock and farming in a way that today's children do not.   Still, it is my belief that we are all happier when we feel useful and needed by those around us.  It is even better when we feel competent and able to help.  

Along with academic success, good friends, and a healthy body, I want my boys to know that they are capable of caring for themselves and others.  So although I promised the boys a break from academic work for the summer, I took this opportunity to help the boys learn some basic skills--preparing meals, doing laundry, doing basic car maintenance, caring for the yard, and cleaning a house.  Much to my surprise, they are already well on their way to mastering these basic skills.  



I am very excited about their progress and their attitude.  What could be a better gift from a parent to a child than the ability to leave the nest.  Why wait until you're grown to learn how to cook a meal?

Of course, all of this is easier said than done.  The laundry is rarely done the way I'd like it.  The bathroom sink isn't really clean.  It took John over an hour to change the oil in the car today with his three "helpers."  Yet, there are payoffs.  Denver is particularly proud of his ability to use a knife.  He prepared fresh peaches for everyone at lunch, and used his knife to slice even more peaches for his evening snack.  Listening to the boys laugh as John Robert teaches Spencer how to do the laundry is priceless.     

John Robert and Spencer are supposed to be putting
clean sheets on the bed.  I had to go see what all
the shouting was about!