Thoughts on John Robert

John Robert enjoys working and playing
on the computer.  We no longer limit
the amount of time he can play.

Prior to homeschooling, John Robert (then 11), had begun worrying about "being cool."  He began worrying about his clothes, his behavior, and whether or not his interests were acceptable to his school friends.  In order to avoid being teased, he was losing himself to an image he felt the need to create.

This image did not include loving academic work.  It did not include being loving and accepting of his family. His father and I had become somewhat of an embarrassment to him, as had his brothers.  I was told by other parents and parenting experts that this was normal.  It might be normal; but it didn't feel healthy.

After two years of homeschooling, most of that has changed.

John Robert is now more loving toward his brothers than ever.  He gives me hugs and is extremely helpful and kind to both his father and me.  He does the family's laundry, keeps track of his own checking account, and doesn't have to be told to do anything-- although sometimes around noon, I do suggest he wake up!

John Robert's academic interests have returned with gusto, and in addition to becoming a Duke TIP scholar through his high SAT scores, he has chosen to attend a week long university math camp this summer-- for fun!  He has hobbies and a sport that he pursues with enthusiasm.  He definitely has clothing preferences, but they seem to be based on comfort.  They are definitely not based on fashion!

John Robert with brothers after a hike
at Charlie Elliot.

Where is the rebellion, the loud music, the eye rolling, the sighing and storming to his room? Could it be that more freedom creates less to rebel against?  Maybe more time with one's own thoughts allows a child to pursue his interests and be happier?  Perhaps more time with one's family creates richer opportunity for stronger, loving bonds.  Or maybe all the typical teenage stereotypes have just not yet arrived.


I don't have all the answers.  But last night I had a hug from a tall, sweet, teenager who is taller than me.  That is all the evidence I need that we are doing the best thing for our Jibber.

Jibby was very proud to have Nana and Papa Dale
drive all the way from Missouri to see him swim.

Mr. Hollow Leg